Seduction

Seduction is like writing a novel, you have to know the beginning, middle and end.

The beginning is very innocent; the middle contains excitement, and a climax, the end is a peaceful resolve, a satisfaction: love.

The path of seduction is long: Seduction isn’t about getting someone to bed, it’s about reaching your desired outcome. If I want a relationship with someone, that requires seduction also. It’s a skill that is relevant for any situation: if you require favour, that also requires seduction. Seduction is presenting yourself favorably or asking in an inviting manner, so that people will be pleased to help you, they will desire to help you because they think of the great pleasure they get out of it.

As for archetypes (from the Art of Seduction by Robert Greene), the sex siren/rake and ideal lover are direct contrasts: seemingly, one cannot be both. There always need to be a Yin and Yang: passive and aggressive. Passive aggressive is the worst: you really should not try to be both at once. The siren/rake delivers promises and leaves people wanting, the ideal lover delivers actual goods. There’s a total difference here: one is playing with fantasy, one plays with reality.

The ideal lover applies themselves to fulfilling all desires, desires for romance, art, and intellect along with sex, while the siren has a more seductive play, also providing intellect, but more of a cat and mouse game: the siren just toys, while the ideal lover acts. Fantasies are stronger than reality, what both rely on is a huge sense of bringing fantasy, but for sirens victims they remain mostly imaginary (yet powerful), while ideal lover being physical and real gains. Being an ideal lover means actually putting in a lot of time and effort on real acts, rather than just words, which many are unwilling to do. The ideal lover makes you center stage, while the siren draws attention to herself and makes herself center of the stage.

It sucks to realize sometimes I was playing the ideal lover, a part I don’t want to play. I don’t want to serve my partner fulfilling their needs, I want them to be sucked into my fantasy fulfilling mine. Only then realize that someone was playing me, what a tricky guy!

The illusion of zero defenses is important. Kind of like hiding your army in a Trojan horse, or not disclosing your entire army, it’s ok to protect yourself, but not seem like the type that has been hurt before and constantly on the defense. People want to feel comfortable and jovial. Leave your fears at the door, or at least, have your defenses but not show them.